I would like to share with you a personal experience from this weekend. My house is sold, it was a great investment, and I am nearing the end of this transitional phase of my life. This past weekend was moving weekend, which symbolized a purging of the old metaphoric baggage as I let go of things that no longer served for my highest purpose. It was very emotional to say the least.
Saturday was moving day and that morning I still needed to pack the pots and pans and dishes. While putting towels and dish cloths between plates while stacking them, I realized that I didn’t have enough boxes to complete packing. My emotions were on overdrive as I am watching the clock waiting for the arrival of my moving helpers and trying to figure out how I am going to finish this on time. My breath started quickening and growing shallow, and tears started running down my face. All week I have been packing my house and this was the apex of what I had been working towards. My mind was flooded with all these thoughts about how stressed I have been, how much planning and hard work I had put into packing; but there also were many factors that layered on top of what I was feeling (as it always goes).
My hands were trembling as I kept packing and I realize that I am having a panic attack. Waves of anxiety crashed into and through me like waves hitting rocks when the tide comes in. I was totally swept into the intensity of the waves, and for a moment I had lost total control. Something clicked within my conscious mind, possibly my angels reminded me that I never loose my power unless I give it away, that I could do something about this- EFT. My trembling hands started tapping the “karate chop point” on my hand and through my short blubbering breaths I started talking myself down. I wasn’t able to get the whole sentence out – “Even though I feel anxious, I deeply and completely accept myself”- I just focused on key words., “calm” “accept” “faith” “it’s ok” “I am supported” “it will all work out”.. Slowly I was able to start to form a sentence as my stress response started to ease up and my mind started to calm. Within a few more minutes, I was feeling better and my rational mind was back online. I asked for help and luckily my step dad had boxes that he grabbed on his way to my house and it all worked out.
The intention of sharing this story was that I wanted to remind you that we are all human and need to be kind to ourselves. The whole reason we came down into these bodies was to have the human experience. Its not about being perfect, and it is most certainly not about shaming ourselves for having our imperfect human experiences. We have all been here, and in a society like ours that tells us to be perfect in every way, the shame becomes unbearable at times when we have those moments when we loose our shit. To be completely honest, I had a couple more panic attacks that day triggered from the thoughts and emotions I was experiencing and releasing through the day. It all needed to happen. It is the process of letting go of the past through this transition, so that I can fully step into the new phase of my life.
So, remind yourself to not judge and shame yourself for getting caught up in the human experience. Even though we work on bettering ourselves on our personal development and spiritual journey, we are still human and there is nothing wrong with getting caught up in the emotions and experiences we encounter, we just need to remind ourselves that we are not the emotions, we simply observe experience to learn and grow from them.
Many blessings to you on your journey!