One way I challenge myself is to open up and share more about my personal journey that has taken me this far and onward. For one thing, I am really private, and another is it’s really intimidating to be vulnerable to the public, especially when you are sharing your gifts. It feels that the stakes are high putting yourself out there to possibly be rejected. But in reality those fears are just the ego trying to keep you safe by keeping you small. “Thank you Ego, I love you too but I am choosing to be brave.” Is my mantra to counter those thoughts. It takes courage to talk about and share your gifts. This is my practice of sharing my gifts with courage – to act even though I’m afraid.
This assignment was one to help me work through accepting my gifts as a Medium which is considered a gift of communication. Mediumship has been a gift that I have most feared because of scary experiences experienced when young. Even though I have come a long way, wounds take time to heal. Meeting and getting to know a few angels, and Orion, helped me build confidence and safety around communicating with them.
I spoke with my Guardian Angel, Orion, this morning. This is what he had to say:
Hello dear one. It is good to speak with you again. I am enjoying witnessing your transformation in to Iris. You are correct to say that you are a pillar of light because that is who we all are in our true essence. There is so much love here for you and for everyone, you only need to get out of the way to allow the love to flow to you. The judgement, yes, is a self-defense mechanism but it is also the workings of the ego. The ego wants to protect you but it also has an imagination that fosters worry, greed, hatred to self through the guise of the misinterpretation or projection of what others are doing to you. Once you have learned to love thy self and know whom thy self truly is- a beam of light, only an extension form source. Then your world will open up. Your life will truly begin to be lived and appreciated for all the miraculous things that happen for us to further our ascension process. It is walking a fine line of practicing self-awareness and also knowing that nothing is truly about you. But since we are all connected in a network we call Source- what happens to you happens to others; what others are suffering, you are suffering too. When we can work on letting go of the delusion that suffering is life and suffering is eternal, then we can ascend. Suffering is part of the process but it is NOT us. We are not the suffering. Just as the butterfly is not the pupa but the butterfly gestating from within. This is an analogy of who we are in our ascension process. Once the realization of self has been accepted, we then may emerge from the pupa as our true self - the butterfly. What a beautiful gift it is to realize and accept that we all are butterflies in the many phases of self-becoming.
Yes, one more thing. You are never lost or forgotten or unworthy. Because you are source within, you are always worthy of everything you most desire. Remember to not listen to those thoughts that start to manipulate and distort. The truth that is we are all love and loved. Period.
Looking back in my journals, this aligns with what Orion usually speaks about. This time though, was different in clarity of the message and tone. The butterfly one is not new, since he helped me to discover that I was identifying as the pupa not as the butterfly a few months back. I am sitting here now in an after glow feeling very blessed to be able to do this work and to use this gift to help me help others. I fully own my mediumship because it needed to be tamed. It needed direction and a focus on who to connect with. Now that I feel more confident in my abilities, I am not fearful but curious about how I can help. “
Another reason I wanted to share this message is because it resonates with everyone and needs to be heard over and over again. Stumbling upon this message today gave me a good reminder that even if I am feeling off, that it is not an indicator of my worth or value, it just is what it is and I should work to recenter. I am not the pain, not the pupa, but the butterfly underneath. As I sit at the Blue Owl café [how perfect!] observing the different people around me, I see that we are all pillars of light. We are all worthy of love and we are all love at our core.
I would love to hear about your journey accepting your gifts. Write in the comments below about how your life has benefited through accepting your gifts? What was most challenging? What lessons have you learned along the way?